Things I Wish I Knew About Mental Health at 16

If I could go back and speak to my 16-year-old self, there are so many things I’d want her to know about mental health.

At 16, everything felt so intense. Friendships, exams, social media, relationships and trying to figure out who I was or what I wanted to do all felt like the biggest things in the world. Looking back, I realise I spent a lot of time believing that I had to deal with everything on my own or that struggling somehow meant I was failing.

The truth is that mental health isn’t something that only matters when you’re in crisis. It’s something we all have, just like physical health and looking after it is important at every stage of life.

So, if you’re around the same age as I was, here are some things I wish someone had told me.

1. You Don’t Have to Be ‘Bad Enough’ to Ask for Help

One of the biggest myths I believed was that other people had it worse, so my feelings didn’t matter. I told myself I was overreacting. That I’d get over it. That someone else deserved support more than I did.

Looking back, I wish I’d realised that asking for help isn’t about comparing your struggles with someone else’s. If something is affecting you, it’s valid.

According to the Mental Health Foundation (2024), seeking support early can help prevent mental health difficulties from becoming more severe.

You don’t have to wait until everything feels unbearable before talking to someone.

2. Social Media Doesn’t Tell the Whole Story

At 16, I compared myself to people online far more than I’d like to admit. It seemed like everyone else had more friends than me, looked better, had more confidence than me and had their lives figured out.

What I didn’t realise was that I was comparing my everyday life to someone else’s carefully edited highlights. Research by the Royal Society for Public Health (2017) found that social media can contribute to increased anxiety, lower self-esteem and poorer body image among young people.

It took me a long time to think about what I was seeing and remembering that people rarely post the arguments, the tears, the failures or the moments when they’re struggling.

3. Rest Isn’t Being Lazy

For a long time, I believed that if I wasn’t constantly being productive, I wasn’t doing enough. Whether it was revising, replying to messages, working or trying to keep up with everything, I found it difficult to switch off.

Now I realise that rest isn’t something you have to earn. The charity Mind (2021) explains that taking time to rest and recharge is an important part of looking after your mental wellbeing, not something to feel guilty about.

Sometimes doing nothing is exactly what your mind needs.