A parent with narcissism usually suffers from a high level of possessiveness, excessive attention seeking, and a persistent need for control of their children. They often lack the ability to understand or care about the feelings of their children, leaving them hurt and vulnerable. Being raised by a narcissist can severely impact a child’s mental health and they may even develop narcissistic traits, as a result. A narcissistic person often does not believe there is anything wrong with their behaviour, so they don’t seek treatment, making it very challenging for a child to escape this situation. This is why is so important that children have the support they need when living with a narcissistic parent.
1. Acceptance
It is practically impossible to change a narcissist, so the first step is to just accept their behaviour and move on. It will help reduce to your doubts and put your mind at ease. It’s best not to confront them, as this could trigger them and cause their actions to worsen.
2. Don’t React
Although it can be challenging, it is crucial to ignore your parents’ behaviour. This is exactly what they want from you, they crave your attention and it is only going to provoke them to continue if you react. The best thing to do is to stay calm and just agree with their actions.
3. Seek Help
It can be extremely difficult living with a narcissistic parent, so you should always get support. Find someone you trust such as another family member or a friend and share your experience with them. They can offer emotional support which may help ease your worries and concerns. However, if you don’t feel comfortable speaking to someone you know, you can approach someone professional. Childline is an anonymous service that provides online support to children suffering with their homelife. If you’d prefer to see someone in person, Little Lives UK provide children with free therapy sessions in schools across the UK.
4. Spend Time with Friends
Spending time with your friends can help remove you from your parent and distract you from your problems at home. It can also be an opportunity for you to discuss your difficulties with your friends. If it is becoming insufferable at home and seeing your friends on a regular basis isn’t enough, you could always ask to stay with them for a while. This will allow you to have more space from your parents and it may prompt them to reflect on their actions.
5. Prioritise Yourself
A narcissistic parent will generally make you feel worthless and vulnerable, so it is important to prioritise taking care of yourself, putting your needs first and removing yourself from the situation if necessary. Discovering new hobbies and interests will help boost your confidence again and distract you from your current thoughts. Self-soothing is also a great way to remove stress by engaging you in calming activity that focuses you in the present moment. Some of these could involve listening to music or calming sounds, mindful eating or smelling something pleasant.
Learn more about our charity campaign, ‘Someone To Talk To.’ We offer free one-on-one therapy sessions to support children who have experienced childhood trauma.
References
https://www.webmd.com/mental-health/narcissism-symptoms-signs
https://www.childline.org.uk/info-advice/home-families/
https://www.choosingtherapy.com/narcissistic-parent/
https://www.choosingtherapy.com/self-soothing/
